100 Reasons Why Brooklyn Lives Up To The Hype

IMAGE VIA PARK SLOPE LENS

Back on New Year's in 2009, we did a 209 reasons Brooklyn is so badass list, and I swear to fucking gawd it almost killed me. That was almost like the beginning AND the end of FIPS. Do you ppl know how hard that shit is to compile?? Anyway, thankfully Gothamist seems to have a staff of way more patient and qualified reporters than I, cause their list of 100 reasons Brooklyn is so cool totally rocks my socks off.

Read the whole damn thing over thar, but here are a few of my faves Park Slope-y ones:

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Keep Jigglin': The Jell-o Mold Competition

Someone get ahold of Bill Cosby: Gowanus Studio Space (166 7th St between Second and Third Aves) is hosting its annual Jell-o Mold Competition this Saturday, 6/25 at 6pm. 

A cadre of "artists" will make sculptural, edible objects using the most boring dessert option of all time.

Remember that episode of The Simpsons where Mr. Burns tries to endear himself to Bart by offering him dessert in the form of a gelatin dish?  "It's made of hooves, you know," he says. 

What I'm trying to get at is that I'd much rather see it sculpted than eat it. 

Competitors will be judged on creativity, aesthetics, sculptural integrity (as opposed to moral integrity), edibility, and best use of Jell-o.  For an $8 admission, you can see what these weirdos came up with and vote on your favorite for the People's Choice Award.

What's that?  You don't care about art and just want to get drunk? 

Don't worry, buddy.  Jell-o shots are on tap for you, we promise. 

Via Time Out New York

BROOKLYN HERO WATCH: Man Kicked Off Flight for Saying 'Fuck'

You know what fucking sucked about 9/11? I mean besides 3000 dead, the dissolution of our civil liberties, and two wars killing a million people?

What sucked is that it put the airlines in this insanely abusable position of power; it put common American citizens like Flight Attendants on the front lines of Racial and Behavioral Profiling. On a WHIM, Ashley from Minnesota can make Orwellian determinations of who does and does not have the right to travel from state to state.

Fuck.

You better believe flight attendants and other newly-crowned princes of power are able to use that power however they want; even in retaliation against a customer that pisses them off -- and that's exactly what happened here.

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Haagen-Dazs Free Cone Day From 4-8pm [GET FAT 4 FREE]

Sure, it'll probably be packed with screaming children, but FYI, Slopers: Ye Olde Häagen-Dazs on Seventh Ave at President Street is giving away free cones from 4-8pm. No, for once, I'm not lying.

Get your gluttony on, y'all. And I'll see you at the Prospect Park Y tonight to burn off that Vanilla Swiss Almond.

[SPONSORED] Spring Clean with MyClean

“It’s so hard to find good help these days,” someone without any real problems might say. 

But honestly, when it comes to finding someone to come in and clean your sad little apartment, shit is HARD.  The process is always a little weird and a lot sketchy—you often feel so grateful that the house cleaner shows up at all that you pretend not to notice how they didn’t bother to move the coffee table when they were sweeping, or actually clean the bathtub with soap and water.

Enter MyClean, a service that does two wonderful things: 1.) Ensures reliability and accountability on behalf of the people cleaning your home and 2.) allows you to book it all completely online so you don’t need to actually speak words out loud to anyone (always a personal goal of mine).

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