If you're the type of person who leaves a note taped inside your car that gives would-be thieves a heads up to your lack of cool shit, there are 2 simple rules to keep in mind for perfecting the perfect message, as seen in the above photo:
1. Tell the would-be offender what ISN'T in the car: Food, drugs, money, stereo equipment, etc...
*** How to take the politeness a step further: List what IS in the car: anti-fungal foot cream, 3-day old Chinese take-out (PU!) and a CD single of T.A.T.U's "All the Things She Said."
2. Have some manners: Didn't your mother teach you anything? Be polite when addressing your would-be burglar. "Please don't break in -- thanks."
*** How to take the politeness a step further: compliment the thief in your note: "Also, by the look of your reflection in my passenger side window, I can see some well-defined lines on your tricep. Where do you work out?"
Pay the politeness forward, people!