Super Bowl Sunday is a lot like Thanksgiving: you sit around eating obscene amounts of food, and drinking obscene amounts of alcohol, while watching football, except you don't have to do it with relatives, and it’s socially acceptable to do it at a bar. Here are a few places you can hit up in the ‘hood:
1. 200 FIFTH
Arguably the only real sports bar left in the Park Slope even though it pretends to sorta-kinda-sometimes not be one. It’s an obvious choice but I can’t not mention it, though. They have something like 314,159 TVs, so you are practically incapable of not seeing the game. Assuming you can get in.
2. UNION HALL
The premiere bocce ball joint will be celebrating the game with dirt-cheap $3 Harpoon bottles (well, dirt cheap for this neighborhood). They’re also instituting an all-night happy hour with $1 off beers, wines and rail liquor. Probably a good place to go if you want to say you watched the Super Bowl but really just wanted to get drunk at one of your usual hangouts on a Sunday night.
Perhaps I’ve stereotyped The Bell House too much in my own head, but it seems like the kind of place that would be too cool to even pretend they cared about the Super Bowl. And yet they’re not only throwing a party, they’re also creating theme cocktails for the occasion. For $6 you can have a Harbaugh Walbanger (a special harvey walbanger), San Fran Shuffle (Sailor Jerry and Root Beer) or a Ravens Rye (Old Overholt Rye/Gingerbeer). Select pints will also be available for five bucks.
Unsurprisingly, they’re going all-out. Their theme, though, has me confused: a McDowells-inspired menu. As in McDowells, the McDonald’s knock-off from “Coming to America.” Are they trying to make some reference about the Duke Brothers’ cameo in the movie and the Harbaugh Brothers? Maybe? Except they got the Big Mc all wrong. In the movie, Mr. McDowell stresses the importance of the Big Mc’s bun not having seeds. Yet there on Pork Slope’s flyer their bun has seeds. In other news, there will be a wing eating contest with Net tickets as the prize. Not a bad choice for Super Bowl Sunday but I’m just too distracted by this whole McDowells thing.
Now, this is the place I’m most tempted to go to. Why? BBQ pork wings, that’s why. What the hell is a bbq pork wing? Did pigs finally sprout wings only to have them cut off and turned into a delicious dish? I don’t know what the fuck is going on but I do know that BBQ pork wings sound like an idea that can’t be anything short of tasty. Just look at them!
Bark will also have more traditional food and booze specials (4-packs of Sixpoint Tallboys with free jalapeno poppers, 75 cent wings) and some opportunities to win free beers.
But, really: BBQ pork wings.