Does your little Maya, Sasha or Dante want to take a break from their drooling and defecating to drop some beats? They are in luck because the first Baby DJ class of its kind starts on Sept 18th! They accept future beat masters fresh out of the womb, umbilical cord stub still wrapped in gauze just waiting to fall off on your carpet, all crusty and brown. That’s right, I’m talking to you, newborns! The class is for ages 0 - 3 years old. So if your Moby prodigy wants to get their funky fix on for eight sessions and you have $200 bucks burning a hole in your Mulberry wallet, go for it and be prepared to be met with “Cool!”, “What?” And “WTF?!” from luvahs and haters alike.
Park Slope isn’t cool enough for these beat bustin’ babies. No, the class is taught in Crown Heights at Cool Pony, a retail and performance space. You know, the kind of place where you can buy a vintage ironic wide collar shirt, purchase artisanal pickles and learn to folk dance. It’s located on gentrifying Franklin Avenue. The chick teaching the class is Natalie Elizabeth Weiss, a seasoned DJ, musician and mother who introduces fleshy limp beings to playing and handling records. Then there is the mixing and matching of beats and creating samples using modern DJ equipment. Of course certain little monsters are going to want to suck and lick the equipment as well. Her website describes the class like this:
Baby DJ School transforms the caretaker-and-me sing-along experience into an educational escapade into the wonderful worlds of disco, hip-hop, and house! Using singing, movement and interactive technology, little ones will be introduced to playing and handling records, mixing and matching beats and creating fun and funky samples using modern DJ equipment. Baby DJ School encourages babies to love dance music and appreciate the way it’s made in a family-friendly, positive environment!
A fellow FIPS Whack Packer asked me “How insane do you have to be to pay $200 to let your six month old bang around on DJ equipment?” People pay that kind of money to have their kids take Music For Aardvarks, which is basically a group of drooling breast sucking blobs trying to shake tambourines and maracas with their sleep deprived moms. I did it for one session. I might have liked a more powerful beat than "The Wheels On The Bus" while I got to meet other moms. Just sayin'. Turns out this same FIPS Whack Packer had payed bucks to send her toddling son to Music Together classes where “he used to spend half of each class pooping in the corner over a heating vent.” Those classes are $320 for 10 weeks. Money well spent for toilet time. Again, just sayin’.
So what’s your opinion? Wacky baby trend of the times, or just the freestyle funky fresh brother of Baby Aarvarks or Music Together?