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I'm A BR-ALLER

Diktionary

*BALLER - n. Kid free-n-lovin it

*BFI - n. Brilliant fucking idea

*BREEDER - n. Baby maker

*BR-ALLER - n. a BREEDER who's proven themselves to be cool enough that, despite their tendencies to procreate, can still maintain the basic principles of a BALLER attitude and lifestyle.

*COOPRETARD - n. Any annoying person who works at the Park Slope Food Coop

*D.I.N.K-n. Dual income, no kids

*FIPS - n. Fucked in Park Slope; the most badass'd blog on the dub dub dub

*SILTH - n. Sloper I'd Like To Hurt

*SAHM (or "SHAM") - n. Stay At Home Mom

 *SCHADENFOER - n. The feeling of envy and/or hate toward literary wunderkind and Park Slope resident, Jonathan Safran Foer

« The Lost Tribes Of NYC | Main | Half-Assed REVIEW: Tomato & Basil Pizza »
Saturday
Apr112009

BALLER SPECIAL REPORT: ITS CONFIRMED: KIDS TOTALLY RUIN YOUR LIFE

Posted by: AuthorEffed in Park Slope | DateSaturday, April 11, 2009 at 10:45AM

Dear BREEDER,

HAAAA!

"An eight-year survey of 218 couples found that children brought on a sudden case of the relationship blues, with about 90 percent of mothers and fathers feeling dissatisfied with their partner after the birth of a child, according to research published in the Journal of Personality and Social Psychology. 'Sex almost ceases to exist,' said Diana Kirschner, a therapist from Manhattan. 'All their attention goes to the child.'"

Sucks to be you, hunh?! 

What are you guys up to today? We're off to go smoke a joint, enjoy a boozy brunch with some friends and then watch some porn.  Have fun at Kidville!

xoxo,

BALLER

(Urbanite via Daily Intel)

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