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« OMG Will Someone Please Foster This Ah-mazing Dog? | Main | Warner Brothers Cheaps Out on President Street Block Association »
Thursday
Jun262014

Available Soon!! Full House of NYC First Family--$6,500/month--(South Slope)

3 bedroom, 1 bath located on 11th Street between 7th and 6th Avenues in picturesque Park Slope neighborhood. Very hot!!! Close to shops, restaurants, bars, park and Methodist Hospital. Close to F and G trains. Cops outside all the time. VERY SAFE!!! Spacious Back Yard. Front yard needs some TLC.

High profile landlord whom you won't see much of in person but will see all over the news. This is available soon!! WHAT'S NOT TO LOVE? Must shovel walk during winter in front of news crews and have stoop available for press conferences. 

Good credit--no pets--THIS WON'T LAST!!!

Or so says the Craigslist ad in my brain for our mayor's Park Slope house possibly MAYBE going up for rent. FULL DISCLOSURE: I have no idea if they would be pet friendly. But seriously, couldn't you see De Blaz using Craigslist to rent his house while he and the King and Queen of the Mermaid Parade go shake shit up in Gracie Mansion?

Also, let's be honest, our mayor is no slouch. While we the taxpayers get to put him and the wife and kiddies up in the mansion Gracie built, he is going to be renting out his place. According to the New York Post, who is furious about this by the way, the mayor could get anywhere from $5000-6500 a month for his place. Which was JUST refinanced by De Blasio at a lower interest rate.

The Post was also so kind to do the math for us: the mayor has basically saved a couple Benjamins a month off of his $3,650 a month mortgage. Which means good ole Bill could turn a near 3K profit whilst yucking it up on the east side. 

And if the mayor wanted to sell the house at some point, he could also make a pretty penny from the sale of a home he initially took a $360,000 mortgage to buy back in the days of the Old Republic, before the dark times... before the empire. 

“I would say that it would probably sell for $2.2, $2.3 [million], and that’s a conservative guesstimate. This is the center of the universe. We’re our own planet now, here in Brooklyn.” So says an unidentified Brooklyn real estate broker who pretty much insulted Pluto and all those who feel it should still be considered a planet. 

I guess now would be a good time to mention that sources close to the mayor aren't saying this is definitely going to happen. Rebecca Katz, spokeswoman for the Mayor said simply, "It's still being decided." 

Who's taking bets that this is going to happen?

 

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