John Turturro Is Our Compass

Dear John Turturro,

I have no fucking clue what this commercial is about.

Literally none...like I've watched 3 times and I'm still unsure if you are supposed to be crazysexycool or ...??? UnDEStinated? Is this some sort of hipster retardo speak that I just don't get?

Anyway.

It doesn't really matter! Cause we don't drink Heineken....and I don't know anyone who does. BUT (and this is a big BUT), we still T-O-T-A-L-L-Y love you anyway! Almost as much as Hodgman! And we hope you do tons more commercials! And movies! So you can keep Park Slope center stage at the highest levels of Hollywood glamour and power!

See you on the Q?

Love to love u,
FIPS

(via Brooklyn Hall of Fame)

Brooklyn = Sexy [Buzz]

+ Moving with reusable plastic bins...instead of loads of months long collected Fresh Direct boxes. (NY Times)

+ Are these the funniest white guys you know? (Urban Eye)

+ Sex during and after pregnancy...learn all about it at Babeland (OTBKB)

+ A simpler way to make a doctor's appointment...online! (Springwise)

+ Regina Spektor is at the Bowery Ballroom tonight. (Gothamist)

+ Should you or should you NOT propose at a restaurant? (Eat Me Daily)

BREAKING: Park Slope Is The 7th 'Dreamiest' Nabe Ever...ANYWHERE

Duh.

I mean, *we know* that everyone who doesn't live in Park Slope is jealous...and also probably has low self esteem...but now HGTV knows it too!

HGTV's FrontDoor.com picked 10 of the dreamiest nabes, and though we dispute the #5 inclusion of Coral Gables (as Florida is way too fucking hot to ever be considered "dreamy), Park Slope weighed in as #7 on the list:

"This neighborhood's historic charm, top-notch restaurants and shopping, and proximity to Prospect Park make it an attractive alternative to Manhattan for families and professionals. Seventh and Fifth avenues are Park Slope's main commercial areas, while other streets are occupied by renovated brownstones, which can sell for millions of dollars."

Also: lots o' MILF's

Bagel Hole: Friend or Foe?

We say friend, but our neighbor "8thandPrez" was none too happy on a recent morning when they hauled themselves over to the "Hole" only to be refused:

* a toast
* AND a slice

Criminal behavior, or par for the course at the borough's best bagel joint?

As per u, spirited discussion ensues.

(via Brooklynian)

Jesus Fucking Christ: When Did the Russians Get So Agro?

Back in the 90s when the NY Yankees used to kick everyone's ass and weren't synonymous with failed capitalism and greed, one of my favorite things in the world was to read the Boston newspapers the morning after each fucked-up Redsox bloodbath; I loved listening to the laments of the Boston retards after our physics-defying comebacks broke every heart in their shitty little wannabe city.

Well in the same vein, I've been enjoying reading all the international reactions to Obama's inauguration - that's about as close as I'm gonna get to a Yankee victory for the foreseeable future.

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