BROOKLYN STUFF: Retarded, Lame Park Slope Tee

I AM posting this ridiculous/ugly/stupid/retarded Park Slope tshirt right now, however, if any of you actually buy one, I am so never speaking to you again.

Check out this killer copy (grammar and letter case mistakes NOT OURS):
"Brooklyn, but in a good way! -- all in good fun, we love all of Brooklyn, but we know that PS has become the ne plus ultra of gentrified urban neighborhoods. Design features map outline of the neighborhood, it's perfect for jogging in Prospect Park or sipping a cold one or shopping on 5th Avenue..."

"Brooklyn...but in a good way"!? WTF does that even M-E-A-N?

(via our new BFF New to York)

BREEDER TRIBUTE: 'Is This Real Life?'

David after the dentist

You. Are. Welcome.

Superbowl XLIII: Jesus Christ Defeated Again by Swarthy, Closeted Jew.

See, I personally would have thought that G-d couldn't give a FUCK about football; but seeing as Mel Gibson's man-twat diddler and Arizona QB Kurt Warner has gone out of his way to point out again and again and again that Jesus gives him magical powers like Superman's earthsun, I guess we can take last night's Cardinal defeat as a sure-fire sign that G-d likes Jews more than He likes the Goyum.

Now if we could just have the Cardinals play the Gays!

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Common Eats Breakfast at Dizzy's ALL THE TIME??!!

WTF?!

BREEDER is too damn busy with her kids dipping forks in people's water and sticking crayons up their noses to fucking notice Common?? Who eats at Dizzy's?! Allll theee timmme??!!

JJ: Being in NY all the time, do you still eat at Dizzy's in Park Slope?

C: Oh yea definitely. I get breakfast from there all the time. I eat a certain diet. I eat a lot of oatmeal. I eat veggie sausages and some good fruit.

(via Just Jared)

FIPS UNDERCOVER III: Target, Atlantic Center Mall [Worse Than A Pap Smear]

This is part three of our four part series in which we attempt to uncover, once and for all, why the hell Target at the Atlantic Center Mall sucks a big dick.

ICYMI, Here's part one and part two.

NEWSFLASH: it's February. Christmas was over a month and a half ago. Now Duane Reade wants you to buy their Walt Whitman variety pack, chalky conversation hearts and pink M&M's. Back in our fave-oh-reet retail establishment, however, they *still* seem to be "restocking their shelves." That Christmas rush must have been fierce.

Dear anyone who is still claiming this shit is all a fluke: F.U.C.K. Y.O.U.

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