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Monday
Aug022010

Apostles of Park Slope: WTF is this?

 

Apostles of Park Slope is a new indie film that is getting some decent buzz—it just won the Audience Choice Award for Best Comedy at the Manhattan Film Festival, but from this trailer, I have no fucking idea what the hell this movie is about.  All I see is a gravelly-voiced priest, a handlebar moustache, exaggerated accents, goofy font choices, a fat guy named Tiny (hi-larious!). 

What do you think?

Monday
Aug022010

Show Me Your Daytrips! City Slickers Hit the Sticks

It's hard to blog about Park Slope when I am avoiding it as much as possible. So, for the moment, I'm fucked in the Catskills.  Deal with it.

And let's face it: it's just a parallel summer universe of Park Slope anyway. I can't get down the country road but for the 718 t-shirts. And some kids I've never seen before have taken up residence on my goddamn hammock!

Yesterday, in my ongoing quest to broaden junior's horizons, we went mountain-climbing in the Gunks. As you can see, the kid couldn't wait.

Click to read more ...

Sunday
Aug012010

CRAIGSLIST: I've Got a Roommate for You!

Anyone looking for a change of location?  A reduction in rent?  A naked roommate in a Duane Reade inflatable pool? Well golly gee wilikers, do I have the solution for you!  And what would such an opportunity be without the allure of Brooklyn Craigslist casting its beautiful shadow over this offer?

Although you should visit the original ad and click the photo above for a full look at your potential new bestie, I'm a nice lady, so I'mma break it down for you.  Just the facts:

  • A self-described "large person" who "likes to drink and smoke weed (nearly every day)"
  • Dude's "seeing someone who is waaayyy out of his league," so get ready for some hot hot hot slumber parties!
  • Your new roommate's got his self-image issues under control: "Comfortable with my body and am naked frequently generally when it is hot." And you know he's got manners: He gives you the heads up!
  • Your new digs even come with a pool!  He "bought one of inflatable pools for the back yard and hangs out in it a lot to cool off."  Ultimate refreshment.  
  • A bonus: "The neighbors are friendly and from your room/the back yard you can hear the young couple next door having sex."  Plus, he "enjoys it!"  Well, phewf, that takes care of the awkward stage of finding roommate bonding activities to share!

To top it right off, this guy adores animals and already has some fish.  Hours of fun ahead.  For only $360, this could be yours right this very second!  I just wish I hadn't signed on for my studio apartment back in June!

So, since I'm out of the running, who's ready to do it up at 126 Berkeley Place?!  If only I could quit with these exclamation points, but periods just won't do!

Sunday
Aug012010

Murder and Mayhem In Park Slope

Call me stodgy but I really don't appreciate waking up on Sunday morning to crowbar killings in "the city's most liveable" hood.

Do I need to tell you kids to cut this shit out!?

More scoop from The Daily News here.

Friday
Jul302010

#BlogVacay

Hey, so you know how people take real vacations and sit on beaches-n-go snorkeling and shit? Right, well I'm not doing any of that cause I'm a loser, however, I AM taking a blog vacay starting next week. And you're all invited!

WHO: me
WHERE: here
WHY: Cause blogging totally fucking sucks
WHEN: August 1 through 14th

Here's how this shit is gonna work: I'm not blogging for 2 weeks cause I wanna see what life's like when you get to come home from work and actually have nothing to do. But DON'T PANIC, PPL!

I know the thought of a FIPSless day is far too much for anyone to have to bear, so I've enlisted Meredith, Amanda and Allison to run the fucking show while I'm off making sweet love to my Tivo and re-organizing my closet. So yeah, you'll be well taken care of...and probably won't even miss me. Shit, you might even like it better. And then I'll come back and everyone will be all "uhm...it's not you, it's US" and there will be a big messy coup, Gorilla Coffee style, and you bitches will burn a stroller in front of my apt building or some shit.

IT. COULD. HAPPEN.

Anyway, I'm Audi.