BREAKING: FAT PANTSLESS WOMAN DESCENDS ON PARK SLOPE

FIPS reader joe_paluka just contacted us with the scoop of the century: apparently a pleasantly plump, anti-pants, out of her fucking mind (?) woman is roaming the streets of Park Slope.

From Joe:

She had on a winter coat, a backpack, patent leather shoes, but no pants. It looked as if she'd just forgotten to put her pants on. She was strolling purposefully down the street, as if heading to the subway or on her way to work.She was acting as if she was doing nothing out of the ordinary.

Is she crazy or trying to make some kind of fat acceptance statement or what?

Anyone got any more scoop on this Norma Nopants??

FOUND @ 8TH & GARFIELD: GAY CHILD'S HAT

Whenever I see a child's hat or glove strewn onto the sidewalk in Park Slope, I LEAVE IT. It's easy to stifle my human instinct to try and return it to its owner: all I have to do is remember that the last person who tried to do this ended up villainized on the cover of New York Magazine.

The only surefire way to avoid the PC witch-hunt that ensues from publicly describing a child's hat is to stay out of the game altogether. Like my old Jewish grandmother used to say, "No gender-non-neutral assumption-based deed goes unpunished."

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WHO GIVES A SHIT: CRAPPY REALITY TV SHOWS

Yet again, our homies on Brooklynian are serving as inspiration (with this thread on bad Bravo TV). So, we've got another simple question: Which craptacular reality TV shows do you watch?

That's it.

Again, answer in the comments (and feel free to go stealth anon if you want some priv-ass-y).

Here are mine:

• Real Housewives (all locales)
• Millionaire Matchmaker
• Tough Love
• Celebrity Rehab
• Sober House
• American Idol
• Real World
• The City
• The Hills
• Make Me A Supermodel
• AND the best reality show on TV PERIOD: So You Think You Can Dance

(note to self: you have a serious fucking problem)

Japan Doesn't Give A Shit About Park Slope

Our friend is an Exec Producer on that show "I Survived a Japanese Gameshow" and they're currently shooting the second season in (wait for it....) Japan.  He sent me the above pic after his morning commute on the subway the other day.

Keep in mind, this is a Japanese person wearing this sweatshirt...not some snot-nosed BK hipster on spring vacay.

Needless to say, he's getting back to me on exactly how to say "FUCK YOU, WILLIAMSBURG" in Japanese.  We'll print up shirts soon and send you all one. Cool?

MAYBE FAKESTEVEBUSCEMI IS ACTUALLY REALSTEVEBUSCEMI AFTER ALL?

Well, bitches: don't say we never go to bat for your asses.

After learning the other day of the existence of a phantom Steve Buscemi account on Twitter, I have literally been working day and night trying to figure out if this chump was REALSTEVEBUSCEMI or FAKESTEVEBUSCEMI. And let me tell you: its fucking hard out there for a pimp.

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