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Who Gives A Shit: Aunt Suzie's Is A Mafia Hangout?

image via Grub Street

I missed the news segment last week that attempted to connect Park Slope eatery Aunt Suzie's with the mafia, so I don't have the details. However, I do know this: Aunt Suzie's is gross. I've been there twice, and twice the food has been screamingly mediocre.

So without any details or proof, I gotta say: it's not hard for me to believe that there is *some* sort of mafia connection with this joint, otherwise how the hell are they still in business?

Though, in truth: if I were asked to guess which spot in town is likeliest to be hooked in with the mafia, my answer would be Tonios times a million billion. I happen to love that place, however:

  • I never hear/see anyone discussiing Tonio's either online or off.
  • Anytime we go there, it's pretty much totally empty.
  • All the waiters are always wearing dress shirts/bowties. Again, for a restaurant that is usually empty, it's pretty damn formal.
  • The owner always comes around to each table to say hello and shmooze a bit...JUST LIKE ARTIE BUCCO ON THE SOPRANOS.

Anyway, did anyone see the Aunt Suzie's story? What's the dealio?


Found Roll of Film in Prospect Park

This dude Todd Bieber found a roll of film in Prospect Park after the blizzard, got the photos developed, and then made a short video of the images in the hopes of finding the film's owner.

a. Who the fuck still uses film!? I didn't even know that they still make that shit. 
b. Really? There are ppl who still use film?
c. FILM????? 
d. This is some fake art project, right? 

(via Gawker)


Solar Garbage Cans Coming to Park Slope; Hippies Rejoice

Holy shit, the Food Coop's "Bring Solar Garbage Cans to Park Slope Immediately" committee is gonna be SO happy about this development: SOLAR GARBAGE CANS ARE COMING TO PARK SLOPE!

According to All About Fifth's recent newsletter, a bunch of "big belly" solar powered garbage cans are going to be installed in various spots along Fifth Avenue.

What makes these btchz solar, you might be wondering? They are apparently each outfitted with a solar powered trash compactor, which reduces the need to empty them as much. And as no one seems to have much of a need to empty those mofos to begin with, I'd say that this is welcome news.

If you are beyond fucking  bored, you can watch this vid about how these things work (they're already operational in many parts of the country). 


OPEN THREAD: The Week Your Trains Went Poof [IT'S NOT FRIDAY YET]

Vanishing transportation, ice storms, mean dogs, bedbugs, OH MY! Does this week feel like it it's 3,000 fucking years long for everyone else, too? I even started writing "Because it's Friday..." but then I realized IT'S NOT. Goddamnit. Let's shoot the shit because you know you're not doing your work, either.

And here's a baby monkey riding on a pig. Why? Because I have posting access in this blog and Erica is off being important, that's why.


A Dream Come True (Or Else) At Grand Prospect Hall?

As we've previously reported, our favorite local dreamweavers, Michael and Alice Halkias of the Grand Prospect Hall want to construct a 150-room, 11-story hotel in their parking lot in South Slope (or Greenwood Heights or whatever we're calling it these days). Designed—and I use that term loosely—by Brooklyn-based Doban Architecture, the plan would include a 400-space parking garage.

This, according to Mr. Halkias, will be the ultimate gift to the hood: "A magnificent cake: my parking garage." And from one of their flyers: "Our dream is lots of happy, smiley neighbors! More parking. More shopping. More banking. An environmentally sustainable community."

The Brooklyn Paper (my new paper of record) reported that the flyer also contained a not so subtle threat to stick it to the hood if we don't let them have their zoning variance. 

The alternate course would be to cater to a low end clientele with limited budgets, limited options, but with large numbers... The need for profitability will override any consideration of lifestyle, even if it may be undesirable — only profitability and group size will matter.


According to the Brooklyn Paper and Brownstoner, the cake parking lot offering has won over the Chamber of Commerce and 5th Ave BID at least. Not so much Gilly Youner, an architect and trustee on the Park Slope Civic Council. 

I'm very glad that this type of project with this scale, and potential impact on its surroundings, has to get reviewed by both the Board of Standards and Appeals, and also be run by the Community Board! Unfortunately, it does not yet fall under LPC purview, or we would have much stronger safeguards for the neighborhood. 

"I don't even know where to begin," said Mark Pennell of Pennell Design when I asked him to weigh in on the drawings. This from a dude who is NEVER short of words. (Mark, for his sins is my long-suffering husband and a local residential design+build dude).

A look of pure horror concern crossed his face before he elaborated...

The building looks confused. I'm looking at five different competing architectural styles in the facade alone. This is Brooklyn, not Miami Beach. What kind of precedent would this set? Not a good one, from where I'm sitting. 

Well, okay then. He could barely get the words out. He was close to an apoplectic fit. Fine, he wasn't but he was sighing. A lot.

So, what do you all think? Are we going to let Mr. and Mrs. Halkias threaten us with rap concerts and shit if we don't let them build this ugly ass cake thing? I think they should only build it if it's a big multi-tiered wedding cake design. In pink and white and gold. With a giant lesbian bridal couple on the roof.

Okay, have at it.