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Friday
Dec052014

Random Tag Sale (??) at Old Two Boots Location

Now that Two Boots has reopened in the old Terroir location on 5th Avenue, we couldn't help but wonder what, if anything, might be happening in the old 2nd Street spot just off 7th. 

Welp! Interestingly enough, we discovered some sort of tag sale thing happening in there. Here's the helpful sign on the front door:

Anyone in the market for a broken keyboard?

Click to read more ...

Friday
Dec052014

FIPS Broken News: Brooklyn Postal Workers Charged For Redirecting Pot Packages

Police arrested 8 United States Postal Service workers, including two Brooklynites, in connection with a marijuana racket at the Bethpage, Long Island post office. The workers would flag suspicious packages but not for the authorities. Instead they would redirect those packages to themselves.

“Abusing their positions of trust as postal employees, the defendants allegedly stole hundreds of packages to further their drug dealing efforts,” United States Attorney Loretta Lynch said in a statement. The agents seized 12 packages totally 129 pounds of wacky tobaccky. That's $100,000 - $930,000 in street value, which seems like an absurd range but I guess it depends on how good that shit turns out to be. 

The arrested workers are looking at mail theft and drug conspiracy charges. No word on whether there will be additional charges for the overall shitty USPS service we're all subjected to.

Thursday
Dec042014

Whassup: Decemberists Edition

 via yarr.me

Ah, December, the Friday of the year. It is also, incidentally, the worst month in which to be born. You will be doubled-up, as far as presents go, with Christmas. (It should go without saying, this is a very #firstworldproblem.) Jesus Christ, for instance, never once got that pony he asked for. And then they crucified him. Tough life. But your life is better, even if you were born in December, because you have the greatest gift of all: No, not your health, because you live in NY and subsist on takeout. I'm referring to hard liquor, of course! It shall flow through your veins like the Christmas spirit all this month, as you celebrate Brooklyn style. Welcome to Whassup: Decemberists Edition:

* NOW OPEN: Brooklyn Doughnut Plant (Prospect Heights): Yesterday, the first Brooklyn outpost of the Manhattan pastry heaven Doughnut Plant opened. These bastards make huge, square, gourmet (I suppose?) doughnuts filled with PB&J and peanut butter and banana cream. Go get yourself fat. You know you wanna. 

* Thursday, Dec. 4: A Little Chaos, Littlefield: If you were born on the East Coast, you may not know exactly what the Midwest is. For example, the Midwest does not mean Buffalo, so when Buffalo snuggled up under 5,000 feet of snow last month, that did not mean all of the central United States was buried (as some of my friends seemed to assume). So maybe this art opening will help. Brooklyn realist painter LJ Lindhurst is showing a series of (painted) snapshots of seemingly mundane events in Midwest life. They will all be of a fat Packers fan eating a casserole. 6pm, FREE.

Click to read more ...

Thursday
Dec042014

Hey Lazy Asses You Can Get Your Christmas Tree Delivered!

It's the most wonderful time of year when Christians go out to street corners and drop 70 bucks on long-dead evergreens to hoist in their living rooms and the Jews just laugh at them. Actually I'm wrong about that, there's something called a Hanakkuh bush, it's like a thing. It even has a wikipedia page. I had no idea. 

But are you tired of dragging a tree up the street or strapping it to the top of your car or doing this to find the perfect Christmas tree, well here's exciting news: You can get a Christmas tree delivered right to your door, it's like Fresh Direct but for Christmas trees. The company that does it is called NYCtrees and it was founded by two New York brothers Harold and Louis DeLucia. The service offers 4-10 foot Fraser firs delivered to Manhattan, Brooklyn or Queens. Every delivery comes with a tree stand and expert installation. The installers will even clean up the needles before they go. Yeah, I KNOW, that's pretty awesome since my tree is always crooked and I'm always picking up needles from five trees ago.

Click to read more ...

Tuesday
Dec022014

Do You Know The (CT) Muffin Man?

Photo credit: Toby Gingold

 

Always a hospitable place, the center Slope branch of Connecticut Muffin on the corner of 7th Ave. and 1st St. has a lot of us wondering about the dapper man in the skull cap who is there almost every afternoon, obsessively making some kind of structures out of the straws, cups, lids and napkins that they graciously provide.

Some days he takes up two tables in this tiny place and they leave him alone. It started in the summer when he positioned himself outside, drumming very intensely on benches and tables, then he moved inside and began his "hobby," as they call it. His name Is Robert; they don't know anything else about him but have no problem with him unless he does his drumming inside or the café is full, i.e., during the early morning 321 rush. He's silent, absorbed.

Click to read more ...

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