Superbowl XLIII: Jesus Christ Defeated Again by Swarthy, Closeted Jew.

See, I personally would have thought that G-d couldn't give a FUCK about football; but seeing as Mel Gibson's man-twat diddler and Arizona QB Kurt Warner has gone out of his way to point out again and again and again that Jesus gives him magical powers like Superman's earthsun, I guess we can take last night's Cardinal defeat as a sure-fire sign that G-d likes Jews more than He likes the Goyum.

Now if we could just have the Cardinals play the Gays!

In answer to claims that Steelers QB Ben Roethlisberger is not a Jew, I think we can all safely say: Sure he's not.

In other Superbowl news, the line at Union Market during yesterday's pre-game ramp-up was so long that it went all the way back to the g-ddamn fucking HOT DOG section. See?

It took 15 minutes to buy a bunch of Papaya hotdogs - and no, anti-gentrification police, they do not carry these bad boys at 11th street market.

Anyway, There was this deli guy behind the counter who thought he was funny - he was talking everyone's BALLS off with his amateur shtick - it was torture; I thought I was on dooce.com. Did anyone else hear this tool's shitty act? Oh my Christ, shut the fuck up!

Finally, it was announced today that Jennifer Hudson's best-star-spangled-banner-EVER performance was Lip-Synched!

I am absolutely fucking gutted - her performance absolutely made the hair on my arms stand up, and with all the Obama-glow that's been surging through my veins, I'll admit that I even got a bit teary like my retarded jewish mom. I was genuinely bummed to hear today that she had synched it.... And don't give me that bullshit about how she had to fake it: how come Bruce Springsteen could pull it off?

That's all for this season, sports fans; next year in the sub-prime-rate financed house of Jerusalem may all of us be free.