(ed note: Remember when pics like the one above were not considered wildly inappropriate?)

So, just to recap:
*Over the last 6+ months, my 401k has gone from looking like this to looking like this.
*Everyone is in agreement over the fact that we are in the midst of a global financial crisis the likes of which we haven't seen in a LONG time.
*For the first night of Chanukah tonight, I got exactly nothing

And maybe that's why Brooklyn Paper's New Year's Eve: The Last Great Splurge Feature, kinda makes me want to punch someone right in their fucking face.

Having not attended the editorial meeting that took place when this story was pitched, perhaps I'm missing some sort of important nugget of information that can help me understand why in the fuck this story isn't totally ridiculous and/or wildly inappropriate at this moment in time.

I mean, I guess everyone is busy doing budget New Year's Eve bash stories and "how can we give back?" stories and Brooklyn Paper just wanted to buck the trend? Could that be it? Cause really I'm getting angrier by the second.

Here's why: I fucking love caviar, and smoked salmon and pricey chocolate and champagne...and I haven't eaten any of it in a long time. And certainly can't afford any of it for a "last splurge" NYE party. And I don't really know anyone else who can at the moment (otherwise I would have already invited myself over).

So, many thanks Brooklyn Paper...for reminding me just how shitty things really are right now. Happy fucking New Year's to you too.